Tuesday, 7 June 2011

Suspicious MInd

We need to be more suspicious. Especially us gals. Of the many qualities I admired about Nancy Drew, her suspicious nature was one of them. It helped make her a good detective. What kind of sleuth would she have been if she believed everything she was told or didn't question the odd behavior of others? 

If more women were suspicious, especially about the men in their lives, I think there would be fewer broken hearts. Take this season's Bachelorette Ashley, for example. (For those of you who live off the grid or despise mindless reality TV drivel, I guess you won't know what I'm talking about. But watching reality television is a bad habit I haven't been able to kick yet. Don't hate me.) 

So anyway, this poor girl is getting used and abused by a nimrod named Bentley, on national television. She was warned ahead of time by a friend, who knows his ex-wife, that he was only going on the show to promote his business, and was doing it for a lark. Wouldn't that make you suspicious? 

Instead of kicking him to the curb at the first rose ceremony, Ashley falls under the spell of his charming ways, and keeps him around. She doesn't even question him about his motives until a few weeks later. By then she's completely smitten. 

It's disturbing and disappointing how easily women can fall for the old lines used by players through the ages. Why do we let our hearts overrule our heads? A healthy dose of suspicion could have helped Ashley make a better judgment call. 

So the day after she confronts Bentley about his motives for being on the show, he arrives at her house to tell her he's leaving (which is exactly what Ashley's friend predicted he would do). Instead of listening to the loudly flapping red flags around her, she believes his excuse that he's missing his daughter, which is a crock. He's just not that into her, and he has already admitted that on camera. So everybody on the planet (or at least everyone who watches the show) knows he's duping Ashley, except Ashley. 

The most frightening aspect of this man's apparent total disregard for women is the fact that he's the father of a little girl. Is this how he wants his daughter treated by men some day? 

Ashley, for the self-respect of women everywhere, take off your rose-colored glasses and get suspicious. All these guys SEEM nice, but you don't know them yet. Make them prove they're worthy of you. Assume they're guilty until they're proven innocent. Pretend they're murderers and thieves until you know they're not.

In other words, be Nancy Drew for a day. It might change your life.


  1. Great comments, Nancy! I think the bachelorette is in lust, and for whatever reason this idiot's pheromones are too strong for her to resist.

    I also think that these shows make for good educational videos for young women, they should show them in sex education class, as to how to spot a sleazy, lower than scum pond, dirt bag kind of guy.

    Mind you, a lot of this is probably done for the sake of having drama on the show.

    I do feel for his little girl though, I hope he's just putting on an act to gain attention and he's really not a misogynist pig.

  2. Stupid women drive me nuts. The trouble is there are too many of them. I've never been the one who chooses the "bad boy" I've always been attracted to the "good guy." so when women continually get themselves into trouble, I have no sympathy. I'm just thankful we can write about smart ones who may muck their lives up, but can eventually get out. Leave the idiots for the secondary, I s'pose.:)

  3. Thanks for your comments, Diana and Selena. In my fantasy world, Bentley will get his heart stomped on by some strong, take-no-prisoners beauty, and Ashley will choose J.P. and they'll live happily ever after, LOL. Can you tell I'm a romance writer?


  4. I think the problem is that most women tend to only see what they WANT to see and not what they NEED to see. Why? I don't know. We're hopeful. We're dreamers. We're optimistic. We're also a bit dumb when it comes to love. (I've done stupid stuff--hanging on to a guy, hoping he'd treat me better when he just wasn't as in to me as I was to him. Why? It was blind love).

    I LOVE reality shows. Not too much of a fan of the bachelor/ette shows. But I love survivor, amazing race, the apprentice--awesome stuff.

  5. I saw the Jimmy Kimmel interview with Ashley, the Bachelorette, regarding her poor judgment about Bentley, and funnily enough, she mentioned exactly that ... she saw what she WANTED to see, not what was in front of her. We've all done that, for sure.